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Hallowe’en Candy Hierarchy

Somehow this feels like it could be a great exercise for teaching RDA in LIS schools . . .

The Candy Hierarchy (2011)

THE CANDY HIERARCHY (2011)

TOP TIER


(caramel, chewy, oh my classy)

Any full sized candy bar[1] — Caramellos — Milky Way — Snickers — Rolos[2] — Twix — Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups — Cash[3]

POST-TERTIARY

(not surprisingly, exclusively chocolate-based)
Hershey’s Kissables — Peanut M&M’s — Regular M&Ms[4] — Junior Mints — York Peppermint Patties — Three Musketeers[5]— regular old Hershey Bars — Reggie Jackson Bar — Kit Kat — Dark Chocolate Hershey

SECOND TIER

(also exclusively chocolate, after fending off a few intruders)
Nestle Crunch — Mounds — Tootsie Rolls — Whoppers[6] — Fair Trade Chocolate[7] — Butterfinger — Pay Day — Baby Ruth  — 100 Grand Bar — Almond Joy — Cadbury’s Creme Eggs[8]

THIRD TIER

(the chewy range or, in some circles, the Upper Chewy or Upper Devonian)
Milk Duds — Benzedrine — Jolly Ranchers (if a good flavor) — Candy Corn?[9]— Starburst — Skittles — Stale Tootsie Rolls — Licorice (not black)

BOTTOM TIER

(the Lower Chewy and Gummy-Based, also the Middle Crunchy Tart Layer)
Dots — Lollipops — Nerds — Runts — Trail Mix —Swedish Fish — Mary Janes — Gummy Bears straight up — White Bread — Black Licorice — Anything from Brach’s[10] — Hard Candy — Spree — Bubble Gum — Including the Chiclets (but not the erasers) — Black Jacks — LemonHeads — LaffyTaffy — Good N’ Plenty — Jolly Ranchers (if a bad flavor)[11] — Bottle Caps — American Smarties [12] — Chalk [12] — “those odd marshmallow circus peanut things” — gum from baseball cards

Tier so low it does not register on our equipment [13]

Healthy Fruit — Pencils [14]— Hugs (actual physical hugs)[14] — Lapel Pins — Extra Strength Tylenol — “anonymous brown globs that come in black and orange wrappers” — Now’n’Laters[15]— Whole Wheat anything — Those little Christian notebooks — Pebbles

Benjamin R. Cohen & David Ng”

http://boingboing.net/2011/10/31/candyhierarchy.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+boingboing%2FiBag+%28Boing+Boing%29

The hierarchy is also available in PDF format

When I was a kid the street word of mouth was who was giving out home-made candy apples.  And, why yes, we did have a dentist in the neighbourhood who gave out toothbrushes.  Downer and bad for his business.

Happy Hallowe’en

Celebrate the Apostrophe!

Stephen

 

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Posted on: October 31, 2011, 3:01 pm Category: Uncategorized

3 Responses

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  1. Rachael Neu said

    What’s the scoop on the apostrophe?

  2. Hallowe’en:
    From the National Museum of American History:
    Hallowe’en? Putting the apostrophe back
    http://blog.americanhistory.si.edu/osaycanyousee/2010/10/halloween-putting-the-apostrophe-back.html
    Or search Google for more.
    It’s a contraction (like the first word in this sentence)
    Boo!
    Stephen

  3. And, why yes, I am a grammar Nazi who makes mistakes al the time!
    SA